The Joseph Factor: 7 Keys to Break the Hold of Sexual Temptation
The Joseph Factor
7 Keys to Break the Hold of Sexual Temptation
By Robert Lee
The story of Joseph tells of a young man en route to destiny. Along the way are various tests and trials, but Joseph eventually realizes God’s purposes for his life.
Perhaps the most difficult temptation comes when Potiphar’s wife incessantly tempts Joseph day after day saying, "Lie with me." For many men this struggle against sexual temptation is the consummate battle which will either launch them towards destiny or disqualify them into a cycle of defeat.
In the coming pages, I will share some Biblical keys to breaking through the stronghold of sexual temptation. I cannot say this process will be easy or sudden. For me it was neither. But what I can promise is that sexual purity and freedom is assured for every believer in Christ. "For this is the will of God, your sanctification, that you be free of sexual immorality." (1 Thes. 4:3).
1. Realize what’s at stake.
“Everything he owns he has entrusted to my care.” -Gen 39:8b
A famous lie of the devil is that our sins will not cost anything. He began with Eve, “You will not surely die,” (Gen. 3:4) but the truth is that compromise will ultimately steal the very life of God within us. A little look here, some brief flirtations there, maybe a peak at something we shouldn’t see—and there will be consequences.
Joseph realized exactly how much he had to lose if he compromised his sexual purity. His master, Potiphar, had entrusted his house to him, “With me in charge, my master does not concern himself with anything in the house.” (Gen. 39:8) He instantly realized the stakes if he fell into immorality—his position, his influence, the well-being of his master’s house would all be lost.
One of the most effective cures for sexual temptation is to visualize the consequences our sin will have. When tempted to gaze at a lewd magazine or watch a perverse TV program, consider the effects of this sin. We have seen houses ruined, marriages destroyed, ministries toppled, and movements halted due to the failure of leaders in sexual purity.
Realize what’s at stake. How much is this going to cost your marriage, your intimacy with your friends, your family, and with the Lord? My whole empire depends on the purity of my desires. For young men of this hour, what is at stake is your destiny and influence with God. If you fail this test of sexual immorality and continually give in, your future with God will be forever on hold, and the loss will be to the entire house of your Master.
Other men’s freedom is dependent on your ministry. Lost sinners are waiting for your message to come forth with anointed boldness. Nations are in bondage to spiritual darkness and waiting for someone to share the good news. “The whole creation eagerly waits for the liberation of the sons of God.” (Rom. 8) Do not sell your birthright for this morsel of bread.
2. Acknowledge any impurity as sin against God.
“How could I do such a wicked thing and sin against God.” Gen. 39:9
Often men try to rationalize their conscience by denying that what they are doing is a wrong. “It's all right if I look as long as I don't touch. We aren’t going all the way.”
Jesus makes it clear. "Whosoever looks at a woman to lust after her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." (Matt. 5:28) He applies the Old Testament law to internal standards, and in the following verse adds, “And if your right eye offends you, pluck it out…or if your right hand offends you, cut if off.”
Our society has lost shame by blurring this line of holiness. Words like lasciviousness, concupiscence, and defrauding are now forgotten, and people claim the only sexual sins forbidden are adultery or fornication. We must define the terms of Scriptures so that we come into agreement with God’s standards.
The sin of lasciviousness for instance may be defined as “arousing desires that cannot be righteously fulfilled.” Forbidden in 2 Corinthians 12:21, Galatians 5:19, 1 Peter 4:3, and Jude 4, this definition puts many simple acts of sexual or playful flirtation in the category of known sin. This “lewdness of looseness of our passions” acts without restraint. When we are out of control with what our eyes see or our minds are visualize, we are in danger of slipping down the slope towards lasciviousness.
Colossians 3:5, 1 Thessalonians 4:5, and Romans 7:8 forbid concupiscence—“a fixation or preoccupation with a certain subject or image.” If we hold some fantasy constantly in our mind, speak and dream about some fulfillment outside of the boundaries of God, we are again guilty of sexual sin without the actual act. This definition brings our thought-life under God’s holy scrutiny.
Finally, the sin of defrauding is best understood as using our position or passions to deceive or manipulate. It’s pretending to be when you are really not. This sin often happens in Christian relationships when men make promises they have no intention of keeping. For those pursuing a relationship, I like to give the “3C” counsel—let your communication, verbal and non-verbal, be consistent with your level of commitment.
If a young man is going to cleanse his way, he must begin by taking heed God’s standard of sexual purity. Joseph realized that an affair with Potiphar's wife was nothing other than a sin “against God" and God’s standards.
3. Maintain constant vigilance.
“She spoke to Joseph day after day.” –Gen. 39:10
God has given me the victory over my sexual past iniquities and present temptations. I have confessed it as sin and seen his healing, forgiveness and power to live without a hint of sexual immorality. But make no mistake, the battle is never ended, and in the words of Thomas Jefferson, "the price of liberty is eternal vigilance."
As men we can never let our guard down. The temptations to lust are all around our society and change with every season of the year and fad culture. One young man asked an eighty year old gentleman when temptation to lust went away, and the older gentlemen replied, "Not yet."
Potiphar's wife tempted Joseph "day by day, saying 'Lie with me." It was not a one-time event that seeks to compromise the integrity of Joseph. Any man can pass a one time test when he knows the eyes of all are upon him. It is the continual wearing down that falls many a man. You must maintain constant vigilance.
Often after our greatest spiritual victories, the enemy creeps in the garden unnoticed and tempts us with the lust of the eyes. A successful man is just as susceptible as an impoverished. The only answer is to keep our guard continually up, day after day, be vigilant against the slippery slope of compromise and maintain the wall of fire around our eyes, mind, and heart.
One practical way I can gauge my vigilance is my eyes. If I begin compromising what I look upon or taking second and third glances, I have begun to slide down the slope towards immorality. At this point—no later—I need to repent to God, ask for His cleansing, and rebuild the standard. Job says, “I have made a covenant with my eyes. Why should I look upon a young woman?” (Job 31:1) He understood that purity was a daily commitment.
4. Do not battle alone.
“None of the servants was inside.” Gen. 39:11
When Joseph was cornered by Potiphar's wife, “none of the men were in the house with him." He was left alone. Tragically, this isolation is true of many men who are struggling against pornography. .
More that avoiding solitary situations, the young man of God must avoid a solitary lifestyle that cuts him off from other men. “Through desire a man, having isolated himself rages against all wise judgment." (Prov. 18:1) An isolated man has little power to break free of his private sin, because he has the luxury of keeping it just that—private.
Men were created to be together. Like geese flying in formation, one is lifted by the wings of another, and as long as they stay aligned, there is increased power. Against our independent culture mentality, a man will only achieve his true potential as he is related and refined with other men.
Identity comes from relationship. I am my father's son, and my son's father. Strength and meaning comes from my responsibilities to contractual and spiritual relationships. I am defined by other men and their words over me.
Man of God, do not get left in the house alone. Bring other men your age, older and younger into your life to experience the battles you are fighting and win them together with you. Joseph was vulnerable when he was alone, as are we. Friendships and accountability are irreplaceable in your fight to be sexually free from sin.
You cannot, I repeat, cannot, fight this battle alone.
5. Do not get caught.
“She caught him by his garment.” --Gen. 39:12
Potiphar’s wife grabbed onto Joseph’s clothing to bring him into her trap. This grasping out of sin to capture a young man of God is a perfect picture of the clutches of pornography. Lust starts very subtly, but if allowed the least amount of room to continue, it will grab a man’s soul and inevitably ensnare him.
James 1:13-15 describes this invading process of sin. A man is “dragged away by own desires,” when the suggestion or influence of lust comes near his life. At this beginning point we must make a quality decision against the invasion. Nip it early in the bud if you want to be successful in perfecting holiness in the fear of the Lord.
Someone taught me this trick early in my resistance against lust. The moment a thought comes into the mind, we must immediately cut if off—like the eye that causes you to sin. I would audibly say, “No!” the moment a tempting thought came to mind.
A second tangible act of nipping it early is turning our eyes away from any provocative sights. The eyes are the gate of the soul. Jesus says, “If your eyes are good than your whole body is full of light.” The battle for men begins with the eyes; which is why the practice of immediately bouncing our eyes from seductive women, shows, internet, sites, magazines, etc. is such a powerful practice. Maintain the purity of your eyes and you will see the transformation of your desires.
This practice of “bouncing our eyes” is described in detail in the contemporary handbook against lust, Every Man’s Battle. By bouncing our eyes early, we develop a habit of purity. Like any habit, this is difficult at first and requires discipline, but after a couple weeks of practice, we find great freedom and control from bouncing our eyes.
6. Be naked and honest before others
“He left his garment in her hand.” --Gen. 39:12 a
Many men are wearing garments that prevent God from dealing with them on the issue of sexual purity. Most addictions, including lust and pornography, stem from a deep desire to be loved, a deep need for comfort that is inappropriately pursued. We may ask ourselves what it is we really hope to gain from such behavior, and as we allow God to search our heart, we will often find holes in our own soul.
Men taking a peak at pornography must honestly admit their sin. "If any man confess his sins, he will find mercy." “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive our sins and cleanse us of all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9) Confession is the fist step of freedom. "Confess your faults one to another that you may be healed."
Here we could learn a few things from the Catholic background. A confession privately to God is certainly sufficient; however, there is power in confessing our faults to other men. Hearing it from our own mouth and getting everything in the light leaves no room for the devil's accusations.
Joseph left his garments in the hand of the sinful adulterous, but in this act of utter humility, he was delivered from the temptation. Jesus hung naked on the cross and had nothing in his life hidden from the Father’s stare. Such transparency is the need of the hour. It lends credibility to our leadership, authority to our message, accountability to our private walk, and wonderful fellowship with a Living God who dwells in approachable light, who without holiness no man will see.
7. Flee
Joseph knew that he could not get caught in the house alone, and the moment the tempter came, he immediately ran from the temptation. The Bible says, “flee fornication,” (1 Cor. 6:18) for any rationalization, any hesitation, or flirtation with this enemy, and the battle is already lost. The mistake that many men make is thinking they can withstand the temptation. They put themselves in vulnerable positions, resist for a period of time, but ultimately fall from being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Joseph realized that his only hope of deliverance from Potiphar’s wife was to run with all of his might out of the house. With lustful persuasions, the rule must be always flight, never fight.
During my early struggle with pornography, simply knowing such materials were in the house brought about extreme struggles. The endorphins in the mind begin kicking, the pictures in the brain begin to flicker, and before long we are slaves to our passions.
We must make no provision for the flesh, and when in a dangerous situation, no amount of Bible quoting, prayers or confessions can deliver from the immediate temptation. We must flee.
Men do not flee because of pride. Men do not flee because of a desire to live on the edge of danger, a flirtation with temptation. But lust is a snare that works deceptively to bring subjects into its grasps—like an ox led to the slaughter.
If you are a young man struggling with internet pornography, turn off the system. Put blocks on the browsers. Do not expose yourself to unnecessary temptations. If magazines or soft pornography ads are in your house, dispose of them completely. Remove any remnant of temptation out your grasps.
The reason we must flee sexual immorality is that God will allow no compromise with the enemy in this area. He knows the slightest bend in our will, the smallest crack in our armor is like a leak in the levy. When pressure comes, when tiredness and spiritual fatigue set in, unless we have removed any remnant of the temptation far from our grasp, our flesh will fall into this sin.
Young man, make no bargains with the enemy in your sexual purity. Become like Daniel and his friends who purposed in their heart that they would not be defiled by the spirit of the age. Purpose toward holiness and remove yourself from the allures of sexual temptation. Once this quality decision is made, you are on your path to victory and to your destiny.
7 Keys to Break the Hold of Sexual Temptation
By Robert Lee
The story of Joseph tells of a young man en route to destiny. Along the way are various tests and trials, but Joseph eventually realizes God’s purposes for his life.
Perhaps the most difficult temptation comes when Potiphar’s wife incessantly tempts Joseph day after day saying, "Lie with me." For many men this struggle against sexual temptation is the consummate battle which will either launch them towards destiny or disqualify them into a cycle of defeat.
In the coming pages, I will share some Biblical keys to breaking through the stronghold of sexual temptation. I cannot say this process will be easy or sudden. For me it was neither. But what I can promise is that sexual purity and freedom is assured for every believer in Christ. "For this is the will of God, your sanctification, that you be free of sexual immorality." (1 Thes. 4:3).
1. Realize what’s at stake.
“Everything he owns he has entrusted to my care.” -Gen 39:8b
A famous lie of the devil is that our sins will not cost anything. He began with Eve, “You will not surely die,” (Gen. 3:4) but the truth is that compromise will ultimately steal the very life of God within us. A little look here, some brief flirtations there, maybe a peak at something we shouldn’t see—and there will be consequences.
Joseph realized exactly how much he had to lose if he compromised his sexual purity. His master, Potiphar, had entrusted his house to him, “With me in charge, my master does not concern himself with anything in the house.” (Gen. 39:8) He instantly realized the stakes if he fell into immorality—his position, his influence, the well-being of his master’s house would all be lost.
One of the most effective cures for sexual temptation is to visualize the consequences our sin will have. When tempted to gaze at a lewd magazine or watch a perverse TV program, consider the effects of this sin. We have seen houses ruined, marriages destroyed, ministries toppled, and movements halted due to the failure of leaders in sexual purity.
Realize what’s at stake. How much is this going to cost your marriage, your intimacy with your friends, your family, and with the Lord? My whole empire depends on the purity of my desires. For young men of this hour, what is at stake is your destiny and influence with God. If you fail this test of sexual immorality and continually give in, your future with God will be forever on hold, and the loss will be to the entire house of your Master.
Other men’s freedom is dependent on your ministry. Lost sinners are waiting for your message to come forth with anointed boldness. Nations are in bondage to spiritual darkness and waiting for someone to share the good news. “The whole creation eagerly waits for the liberation of the sons of God.” (Rom. 8) Do not sell your birthright for this morsel of bread.
2. Acknowledge any impurity as sin against God.
“How could I do such a wicked thing and sin against God.” Gen. 39:9
Often men try to rationalize their conscience by denying that what they are doing is a wrong. “It's all right if I look as long as I don't touch. We aren’t going all the way.”
Jesus makes it clear. "Whosoever looks at a woman to lust after her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." (Matt. 5:28) He applies the Old Testament law to internal standards, and in the following verse adds, “And if your right eye offends you, pluck it out…or if your right hand offends you, cut if off.”
Our society has lost shame by blurring this line of holiness. Words like lasciviousness, concupiscence, and defrauding are now forgotten, and people claim the only sexual sins forbidden are adultery or fornication. We must define the terms of Scriptures so that we come into agreement with God’s standards.
The sin of lasciviousness for instance may be defined as “arousing desires that cannot be righteously fulfilled.” Forbidden in 2 Corinthians 12:21, Galatians 5:19, 1 Peter 4:3, and Jude 4, this definition puts many simple acts of sexual or playful flirtation in the category of known sin. This “lewdness of looseness of our passions” acts without restraint. When we are out of control with what our eyes see or our minds are visualize, we are in danger of slipping down the slope towards lasciviousness.
Colossians 3:5, 1 Thessalonians 4:5, and Romans 7:8 forbid concupiscence—“a fixation or preoccupation with a certain subject or image.” If we hold some fantasy constantly in our mind, speak and dream about some fulfillment outside of the boundaries of God, we are again guilty of sexual sin without the actual act. This definition brings our thought-life under God’s holy scrutiny.
Finally, the sin of defrauding is best understood as using our position or passions to deceive or manipulate. It’s pretending to be when you are really not. This sin often happens in Christian relationships when men make promises they have no intention of keeping. For those pursuing a relationship, I like to give the “3C” counsel—let your communication, verbal and non-verbal, be consistent with your level of commitment.
If a young man is going to cleanse his way, he must begin by taking heed God’s standard of sexual purity. Joseph realized that an affair with Potiphar's wife was nothing other than a sin “against God" and God’s standards.
3. Maintain constant vigilance.
“She spoke to Joseph day after day.” –Gen. 39:10
God has given me the victory over my sexual past iniquities and present temptations. I have confessed it as sin and seen his healing, forgiveness and power to live without a hint of sexual immorality. But make no mistake, the battle is never ended, and in the words of Thomas Jefferson, "the price of liberty is eternal vigilance."
As men we can never let our guard down. The temptations to lust are all around our society and change with every season of the year and fad culture. One young man asked an eighty year old gentleman when temptation to lust went away, and the older gentlemen replied, "Not yet."
Potiphar's wife tempted Joseph "day by day, saying 'Lie with me." It was not a one-time event that seeks to compromise the integrity of Joseph. Any man can pass a one time test when he knows the eyes of all are upon him. It is the continual wearing down that falls many a man. You must maintain constant vigilance.
Often after our greatest spiritual victories, the enemy creeps in the garden unnoticed and tempts us with the lust of the eyes. A successful man is just as susceptible as an impoverished. The only answer is to keep our guard continually up, day after day, be vigilant against the slippery slope of compromise and maintain the wall of fire around our eyes, mind, and heart.
One practical way I can gauge my vigilance is my eyes. If I begin compromising what I look upon or taking second and third glances, I have begun to slide down the slope towards immorality. At this point—no later—I need to repent to God, ask for His cleansing, and rebuild the standard. Job says, “I have made a covenant with my eyes. Why should I look upon a young woman?” (Job 31:1) He understood that purity was a daily commitment.
4. Do not battle alone.
“None of the servants was inside.” Gen. 39:11
When Joseph was cornered by Potiphar's wife, “none of the men were in the house with him." He was left alone. Tragically, this isolation is true of many men who are struggling against pornography. .
More that avoiding solitary situations, the young man of God must avoid a solitary lifestyle that cuts him off from other men. “Through desire a man, having isolated himself rages against all wise judgment." (Prov. 18:1) An isolated man has little power to break free of his private sin, because he has the luxury of keeping it just that—private.
Men were created to be together. Like geese flying in formation, one is lifted by the wings of another, and as long as they stay aligned, there is increased power. Against our independent culture mentality, a man will only achieve his true potential as he is related and refined with other men.
Identity comes from relationship. I am my father's son, and my son's father. Strength and meaning comes from my responsibilities to contractual and spiritual relationships. I am defined by other men and their words over me.
Man of God, do not get left in the house alone. Bring other men your age, older and younger into your life to experience the battles you are fighting and win them together with you. Joseph was vulnerable when he was alone, as are we. Friendships and accountability are irreplaceable in your fight to be sexually free from sin.
You cannot, I repeat, cannot, fight this battle alone.
5. Do not get caught.
“She caught him by his garment.” --Gen. 39:12
Potiphar’s wife grabbed onto Joseph’s clothing to bring him into her trap. This grasping out of sin to capture a young man of God is a perfect picture of the clutches of pornography. Lust starts very subtly, but if allowed the least amount of room to continue, it will grab a man’s soul and inevitably ensnare him.
James 1:13-15 describes this invading process of sin. A man is “dragged away by own desires,” when the suggestion or influence of lust comes near his life. At this beginning point we must make a quality decision against the invasion. Nip it early in the bud if you want to be successful in perfecting holiness in the fear of the Lord.
Someone taught me this trick early in my resistance against lust. The moment a thought comes into the mind, we must immediately cut if off—like the eye that causes you to sin. I would audibly say, “No!” the moment a tempting thought came to mind.
A second tangible act of nipping it early is turning our eyes away from any provocative sights. The eyes are the gate of the soul. Jesus says, “If your eyes are good than your whole body is full of light.” The battle for men begins with the eyes; which is why the practice of immediately bouncing our eyes from seductive women, shows, internet, sites, magazines, etc. is such a powerful practice. Maintain the purity of your eyes and you will see the transformation of your desires.
This practice of “bouncing our eyes” is described in detail in the contemporary handbook against lust, Every Man’s Battle. By bouncing our eyes early, we develop a habit of purity. Like any habit, this is difficult at first and requires discipline, but after a couple weeks of practice, we find great freedom and control from bouncing our eyes.
6. Be naked and honest before others
“He left his garment in her hand.” --Gen. 39:12 a
Many men are wearing garments that prevent God from dealing with them on the issue of sexual purity. Most addictions, including lust and pornography, stem from a deep desire to be loved, a deep need for comfort that is inappropriately pursued. We may ask ourselves what it is we really hope to gain from such behavior, and as we allow God to search our heart, we will often find holes in our own soul.
Men taking a peak at pornography must honestly admit their sin. "If any man confess his sins, he will find mercy." “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive our sins and cleanse us of all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9) Confession is the fist step of freedom. "Confess your faults one to another that you may be healed."
Here we could learn a few things from the Catholic background. A confession privately to God is certainly sufficient; however, there is power in confessing our faults to other men. Hearing it from our own mouth and getting everything in the light leaves no room for the devil's accusations.
Joseph left his garments in the hand of the sinful adulterous, but in this act of utter humility, he was delivered from the temptation. Jesus hung naked on the cross and had nothing in his life hidden from the Father’s stare. Such transparency is the need of the hour. It lends credibility to our leadership, authority to our message, accountability to our private walk, and wonderful fellowship with a Living God who dwells in approachable light, who without holiness no man will see.
7. Flee
Joseph knew that he could not get caught in the house alone, and the moment the tempter came, he immediately ran from the temptation. The Bible says, “flee fornication,” (1 Cor. 6:18) for any rationalization, any hesitation, or flirtation with this enemy, and the battle is already lost. The mistake that many men make is thinking they can withstand the temptation. They put themselves in vulnerable positions, resist for a period of time, but ultimately fall from being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Joseph realized that his only hope of deliverance from Potiphar’s wife was to run with all of his might out of the house. With lustful persuasions, the rule must be always flight, never fight.
During my early struggle with pornography, simply knowing such materials were in the house brought about extreme struggles. The endorphins in the mind begin kicking, the pictures in the brain begin to flicker, and before long we are slaves to our passions.
We must make no provision for the flesh, and when in a dangerous situation, no amount of Bible quoting, prayers or confessions can deliver from the immediate temptation. We must flee.
Men do not flee because of pride. Men do not flee because of a desire to live on the edge of danger, a flirtation with temptation. But lust is a snare that works deceptively to bring subjects into its grasps—like an ox led to the slaughter.
If you are a young man struggling with internet pornography, turn off the system. Put blocks on the browsers. Do not expose yourself to unnecessary temptations. If magazines or soft pornography ads are in your house, dispose of them completely. Remove any remnant of temptation out your grasps.
The reason we must flee sexual immorality is that God will allow no compromise with the enemy in this area. He knows the slightest bend in our will, the smallest crack in our armor is like a leak in the levy. When pressure comes, when tiredness and spiritual fatigue set in, unless we have removed any remnant of the temptation far from our grasp, our flesh will fall into this sin.
Young man, make no bargains with the enemy in your sexual purity. Become like Daniel and his friends who purposed in their heart that they would not be defiled by the spirit of the age. Purpose toward holiness and remove yourself from the allures of sexual temptation. Once this quality decision is made, you are on your path to victory and to your destiny.
posted by ThePowerMovement at 6:10 AM
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